Decisions, decisions

v  I’m going to be a better person

v  I’m going to stop drinking and smoking

v  I’m going back to school

v  I’m going to stop lying, especially to myself

v  I’m going to do my best

v  I’m going to stop being unfaithful to my spouse

v  I’m going to leave my abusive partner

v  I’m going to spend more time with my children

v  I’m going to seek a better relationship with God

v  I’m going to stop making false promises

v  I’m going to start saving money and stop spending carelessly

v  I’m going to take better care of myself

“Talk is cheap.”  Cliché ? Perhaps, but true nonetheless. When people make a decision, that decision does not go into full swing until they act upon it.  This idea has the same concept as “faith without works is dead” (James 2:2).  You can have all the faith in the world but until you put that faith into action and see results, it is meaningless.  A decision without action is dead; it does not matter, it does not exist.  Stop talking and begin taking action to see results.

"Remember, a real decision is measured by the fact that you've taken new action.

If  there's no action, you haven't truly decided." - Tony Robbins

By Xela (7.31.11)

Listen to your father...

"Listen to your father, who gave you life,


and do not despise your mother when she is old.

Buy the truth and do not sell it—

wisdom, instruction and insight as well.

The father of a righteous child has great joy;

a man who fathers a wise son rejoices in him.

May your father and mother rejoice;

may she who gave you birth be joyful! "


(Proverbs 23:22-25)
 

To love is to live. To hate is to die.

When you love a tremendous amount or you love many people, you are living. That is LIFE. However, when you hate just a little bit or hate even just one person, you DIE that much; imagine how much more you would die if you hated more people or hated one person a lot.
There are many circumstances where we as people are faced with things that we have no control over that affect us in a negative way. Some of those circumstances cause us to question the motives of other people. Often times other people’s decisions affect us tremendously and will haunt us for the rest of our lives.

Do not hate anyone for what you had or have no control over (or have yet to have control over). If you truly had no control over a situation, then it was meant to be that way. You cannot do anything about it now. What is done, is done; it is over. What happens now going forward, now that you may have some control over certain things, is what truly matters. This is where you need to be careful. The pain, the hurt and even the resentment is real and very valid in your heart, mind and soul; that is very visible to God. It does not go unseen. Bring that to God. Bring that pain, that confusion, that desire to want to hate anyone to God. Do not allow yourself to be a vessel of hatred but rather continue to be a loving, caring person, just as you have been all your life. This unfortunate circumstance does not make or break you. Yes, it may be a dent in your being but this will make you stronger. You have the opportunity to set things straight on many levels, in different ways.

Whatever evil motive, greedy motive or unknown motive an individual had (or has) that altered (or may alter) your life, may cause you to go into a tailspin if you allow hatred to grow in your heart. That individual will have to answer for his or her own actions. Do not give more power to that which has already caused you pain by breeding hatred within yourself. Instead, pray. Pray for yourself, pray for that person and pray for those that may be affected one way or another. I purposely put “pray for yourself” first because if you are not in the right mind, you cannot even bring yourself to pray for anyone else. Pray that your heart has no room for hatred but rather that only love breed there, because if you invite hate, you will die, even if you are still walking this earth. If you love, love with be with you forever.

No one is perfect. Not the victims of unfortunate situations and definitely not those that do wrong to others. Yet, much can be said about a person in the way he or she reacts to their own mistakes and to the mistakes that others make. Are you an accuser ? Are you humble ? Do you forgive ? Do you hold grudges ? Are you truly sorry ?

Life is hard. We do not know what we will be faced with tomorrow but we can make a decision today, at this moment, about who we will trust: God or the enemy. Make a decision about who we want to be for ourselves and for those we love.

There is nothing new under the sun. God sees all and has seen it all. Therefore, do not be ashamed to bring whatever is troubling you to him; whether you are the victim or the one committing the crime…

Ecclesiastes 1:9

“What has been will be again,

what has been done will be done again;

there is nothing new under the sun.”



Bring it to Him…

(inspired by a friend's story)

Daddy...

I understand but it still hurts...
I love you enough to let go but will miss you terribly...
I am very proud of you but still ask "why this way ?"...
I will forever remember and laugh at every joke you ever told but will cry when I remember your struggles...
You will forever be the most handsome man in the world to me;  the most intelligent; the most valiant...
When I look at you, I look at you with little girl eyes...that will never change...I will forever see you that way...

I hope you know....I hope you understand....I hope you absorb all the love that I have for you during your last moments with us and always...

A Day Like Today (for my son)

(I wrote this back in May, 2010)


A day like today, almost 17 years ago, I was only 19 years old. I was about to become a mother for the first time, a single, unwed mother.




A day like today, I was experiencing contractions and had been for several days but I had no idea; I just knew that I was feeling major discomfort.

If you've never failed, you've never lived !

Click here to see this great, short video

Why "One splinter at a time" ?

I chose "One splinter at a time" as my web address because life is just that: one splinter at a time. Splinters hurt like crazy but they don't kill you (well, not that I know of). Even after you remove the splinter, your finger feels a little sore but there is a sense of relief once it is gone. I think the soreness is a good reminder of what we experienced and overcame: "You made it and you're ok". The funny thing is that you'll get another splinter again no matter how careful you are. How difficult is it to remove the splinter when it is really embedded in your finger ? Oh the drama and the suffering we go through !:  "Get the magnifying glass and the tweezers ! I'm dying !" Yes, I'm exaggerating just a little bit.

When we encounter difficult moments in our lives, do we lose our minds or do we try to deal with the "splinters" with patience ? If out of desperation you rush to remove the "splinter(s)", you will only make things worse because the "splinter(s)" may break and then it will be truly difficult to remove.

Being patient and doing things correctly the first time around will enable you to handle circumstances in a much more productive manner. Dealing with things one issue at a time is better than drowning ourselves in every dilemma that life throws at us.